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I fell in love with my bestfriend

July 4, 2007 @ 1:00 pm

BJ hugging Trey - TREYCRUZ.COM

Twenty minutes after we hung up, there I was in his front yard. “What am I doing here?”, I thought to myself. Sitting in the car I started to cry. Cry about the good and bad times we had. Crying about the long periods where we hardly even see each other. Crying at the thought that he was the one… the one for me, but I know it couldn’t happen because I was just too scared to do anything.

The storm outside begins to growl louder. The rain then begins to pour and there I was still sitting in the car drowning in my own filth of misery. Should I get out of the car? The more likely choice was to go home and come see him some other time. Covered in tears, I backed the car out of the driveway. Before driving off I decided to take one last look at the house for the night. Geez, my windows were foggy… I guess it was from all my heat and the moisture building up inside the car. I stared at the window, and he [reflection] stared right back at me all sad and in pain. I felt so sorry for him. This young man so full of love What’s stopping him? Something was weird. Through his eyes you can see a figure… the figure was vague, so unclear. I cleared the fog from the window with my hand and there stood the figure.

There he was standing on the front porch of his house. He didn’t look so happy himself. Naturally, I got out of the car to go see him. I said “hi” to him, and he replied back ”hi”. I said “hi” jokingly again, but this time I didn’t get a reply. He stayed quiet for a minute or two, that is until I looked up at him and notice he was tearing. “What’s wrong?” I asked him… still no reply. I gave him a hug for comfort and surprisingly he returned it back.

BJ and Trey kissing Gay boys - TREYCRUZ.COM

Soaking in the rain we embraced even tighter. It was getting cold, I began to shiver. With him in my arms I embraced even tighter and with all my might I still manage to shed a tear. It began to form around my eyes and soon my face. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. He asked me, “Hey, what’s wrong?” I didn’t reply. I wanted to tell him so bad, but I couldn’t, I shouldn’t! We embraced even tighter while our heat starts to build. The storm worsens, but I wasn’t worried about it. I just wanted him! I couldn’t stop crying. God, what am I doing wrong? Why can’t I feel like this? This is hurting me so much.

You know what! I’m just going to walk away. I can’t let him see me like this. As I tried to walk away I was tugged from behind. “Please don’t leave” he said. Then he hugs me even tighter while the rain is still pouring and whispered in my ear, “I know why you’re crying. I love you too, I’ve always had.”

Photo from 2005.



2 Comments

  1. #1
    Skye
    July 4th, 2007 at 4:17 pm

    Awwww… I wish I had someone like that

    Well techincally I do, but we didn’t have a moment as romantic, but it was romantic nontheless =D

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  2. #2
    Wenz
    July 5th, 2007 at 5:53 am

    i might be stupid but what did you wanted to tell him? that you love him?

    so a person so logical has a hidden emotional depth. wow. talk about defense mechanism.

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