Holy Cow Batman! Amazonian Tribes Do Exist!

As amazing as this may be, we are going to follow our instincts with Gawker and call this bullshit - WAIT - don’t get all pissy at us! We will call this bullshit until we send Jesus over there to prove it. Seriously, how can anything go “uncontacted” for this many years? Hell, half of the world was discovered before men became trannies.

Amazon Indians from one of the world’s last uncontacted tribes have been photographed from the air, with striking images released on Thursday showing them painted bright red and brandishing bows and arrows.

“We did the overflight to show their houses, to show they are there, to show they exist”, said uncontacted tribes expert Jose Carlos Meirelles.

“What is happening in this region is a monumental crime against the natural world, the tribes, the fauna and is further testimony to the complete irrationality with which we, the ‘civilized’ ones, treat the world”, said Jose Carlos Meirelles.

This sounds gravy and all, but the thing that stumps me the most is how in the world do you become an “uncontacted tribes expert”? That must be a rare occupation - like toilet seat forensics, the art of finding the pooper.